Author's Note...

Here it is, we've come to the end of Cilla and Jon's journey. I want to thank everyone who stopped by to read and, whether you left a comment or not, you were the ones who kept me going, kept me writing.

So, 132,000+ words and two years later, here is the Epilogue.

Epilogue

Seven Months later...

His knee bounced nervously as he looked around and back down the row he was sitting in. Normally being alone at a function didn’t bother him, he was used to being the center of attention, hell that’s how he made his living.  But today, this crowd was just a little different than what he was used to. The men outnumbered the women today by at least two to one and he was feeling more and more like a piece of meat with every minute that passed.  He didn’t even see Cilla; hadn’t seen her since she left him that morning with her dress in one hand and her make-up bag in the other.  

He looked around again.  The outside patio area was tastefully decorated with flowers in pots and baskets and tiny white lights woven through the trees and shrubs.  The weather couldn’t have been more perfect for an outside affair.  Mother Nature had sent a sky as blue as his eyes and she had dressed the trees in their autumn best gold, crimson and russet for this special day.  The seventy-five chairs that dotted the terrace told him that it was going to be a small, intimate affair and this little Inn in Connecticut was the perfect setting.

The shuffling of chairs at the end of the row had him turning.   “It’s about time you got here.”  He smiled and shook his friend’s hand.  “Where the hell have you been?”

Richie smiled and shook Jon’s hand.  “Sorry man.  Got held up at ma’s.”

Jon extended his hand past Richie to the woman who trailed behind.  “Hey Jennie.  Don’t you look beautiful.”

She let go of Richie’s hand to take his and leaned in to buss his cheek.  “Thank you.”

“How’s Abby?”

Jennie smiled, looking more relieved, more at peace today than at other time since Jon had met her.  She gripped Richie’s hand again as she spoke.  “She’s in remission and loving spending time with Ava and Grandma Joan.”

Jon grinned, a wave of relief rushed through him.  He and Cilla and been waiting and wondering about Abby’s prognosis.  He couldn’t wait to tell Cilla.  “That’s the best news I’ve heard all day.”

Jennie smile up at Richie and then back at Jon.  “The best I’ve heard in months, except for you and Cilla.”

Jon smiled widely.  “You’re both coming, right?”

Richie nodded, “you know we wouldn’t miss it man.”

The music started and they turned to face the doors leading from the Inn to the terrace.  Jon craned his head around looking for a glimpse of her.  She stepped into the doorway and he couldn’t breathe.  She was stunning.  Her dress was a deep crimson, the color of the leaves on the trees.  It draped slightly in the front and fit close, hugging her slender form from breast to ankle.  The slit up the right gave him a teasing glimpse of a creamy leg and a sexy stiletto heel.  He dragged his gaze to her face.  He couldn’t help but smile as he raised his camera.

She was absolutely radiant today.  There was no more surgical mask covering half her face to protect her from any little germ that could have had her sick in an instant; the dark shadows that had haunted her eyes for months were gone.  Her hair had started to grow back.  It was still as short as a boy’s, even shorter than his, but it was hers and it was still the pretty deep chocolate that it had been a year before.

As she drew closer to him he unconsciously held out his hand.  He just needed that little bit of contact, just her fingers, something.   Her hand drifted lightly over his, a slight squeeze of his fingers and she was moving past him.  He watched her walk away, his eyes nearly dropping to the ground; the back of her dress dipped low, to the top of the curling scrollwork of her tattoo.  He groaned quietly, there was no way she was able to wear a bra in that dress.  He looked up at her and she smiled slyly at him before turning and waiting for her friend and his groom.  He shook his head, she knew what she was doing and he prayed for the strength to get through the day.

He turned his attention back to the make-shift altar and watched as her best friend married the man of his dreams.  The ceremony was as quirky and refined as the two men who were now joined in matrimony forever.

In just two short months, on an island that boasted sun and sand even in the winter, that would be him and Cilla.

The crowd worked their way back inside, congratulating the men on their nuptials and Jon sought out his girl.  She was at the bar, her back to him as she waited for her drink.  He slid his fingertips up the creamy expanse of her back, scraping his short nails lightly across her nape.  “Hey Beautiful.”

She turned, a smile wreathing her face. “Hey yourself handsome.”

He smiled back at her and tugged her close, “you look amazing Sweets.”

She tilted her head up, pressing her lips lightly to his, “thank you.  Sid did a great job with the dress, don’t you think?”

Jon nodded, as his fingers trailed up and down her spine, “yeah, but I don’t think it would look half as good on him as it does on you.”  That got him the laugh he was looking for.  “I have some news.”

“What?”

He told her about Abby and watched as tears gathered and sparkled on her lashes.  “I’m so happy to hear that.  I need to find Jennie and talk to her.”  She started to twist away but he didn’t let go.

“Just a minute Sweets.”

She turned her eyes back to his.  “What is it?”

He held her gaze.  He hadn’t seen her all day.  He wanted just a minute or two before she had to be off doing her best girl duties for Sid.  He just needed to be with her even if it was only for a fleeting moment.   “Dance with me.  This is our song.”

She cocked her head and listened, a soft smile playing across her lips.  Someone had queued up Frank Sinatra and it was indeed the song they had first danced to on a different terrace, more than a year before.  She let herself be swept into his strong arms as they swayed in a lazy circle in their little corner of the bar.

He couldn’t stop looking at her.  She had fought a fight that seemed impossible to win, one he wouldn’t want to fight himself, but she had done it and won.  Now it was time to move on, look ahead to their future and making their sweetest dreams come true.

Chapter 111

Cilla closed her eyes, and took a deep breath. Would this day ever end? She was supposed to be working on the design for Sid and Mark’s cake, but she couldn’t concentrate. She kept looking at the clock, begging the hands to move faster. Today was the day. Today she would find out if the chemo worked, if she had beaten the monster that had tried to take over her body.

She glanced at the clock again. Thirty seconds had gone by. Damn it. She looked down at the sketch pad. There were doodles all over it, none of them looking even remotely close to resembling a cake. Ripping out the page she tried again to concentrate.

She looked up at the clock again. “Shit,” she muttered and tossed down her pencil. This was never going to work. She slid off the stool and pushed through the swinging door to the front. Sid was waiting on a customer and, at the other end of her newly expanded shop, Jennie was wiping down the coffee machine. Her customer base had doubled when she started offering coffee and a place to sit down to enjoy it. So she had a long talk with Jennie one afternoon, convincing her that she needed her help, just while Abby was in school. Jennie had gratefully accepted the offer. Cilla headed toward the woman. “Is there any coffee left?”

Jennie nodded, “sure, let me get you a mug.” She poured Cilla her coffee and handed her the steaming mug. “Are you okay?”

Cilla nodded as she sipped. “Just can’t seem to concentrate on anything other than the clock today.”

“I know that feeling. What time’s your appointment?” She and Sid both knew that today was a big day for Cilla. “Is Jon going with you?”

Cilla looked to the clock. Not soon enough. “Four thirty. And no, he’s not. He is in New Jersey celebrating his birthday with his kids. He’ll be back later tonight.”

Jennie frowned, that wasn’t good. What if she got bad news? “Do you want one of us to go with you?”

Cilla shook her head, she had started this by herself, she would finish it that way. “No, but thanks for the offer. I can handle this.” At Jennie’s doubtful expression she smiled. “Really, it’s okay. I’ll be fine. If the time would move along that is.”

It was only one o’clock now. She pushed back through the door to the kitchen. It was going to be a long afternoon.

~

“You’re sure?” Cilla looked warily at the doctor.

Dr. Aghajanian smiled reassuringly. “You’ll need to be checked every three months for the first year, but for now, yes. I’m quite sure.”

Cilla sat in the chair a moment longer, not quite able to process what she had just heard. Ever since she had come in the week before for her MRI and blood work, she was sure the results weren’t going to be what she wanted. Her luck had never been that good.

She couldn’t have been more wrong.

The doctor had just confirmed that the cancer was gone. There was always a chance it could come back, she had said. But for now, it looked like the chemo had done its job.

With a smile she stood, gathering up the paperwork the doctor had presented her with. “Thank you Dr. Aghajanian, thank you for everything.”

It was a much different feeling walking out of the doctor’s office today than it had been seven months ago when she first started this journey. Instead of stumbling blindly along the sidewalk looking for a way to escape, she hailed a cab with a gleeful shout. There would be no sad, scared tears today; only happy ones if any at all as she shared her news with the man that had been her rock and salvation for the last several months. Maybe now, after tonight, they could think about having some kind of future together now that there was a chance they could actually have one.

She watched the storefronts go by in a blur until one caught her eye. “Stop here,” she told the driver. She wasn’t going back to her own shop today, it would be closed up by now anyway and she didn’t want to chance running into Sid or Jennie. Jon needed to hear the news first. She decided to treat herself to something totally useless and fun. She perused the window before pulling open the door. She might even find something for Jon in here. It was his birthday after all. She had to buy the man a card or something.

Making a few more stops on her way, it was later than she anticipated when she got home. Jon hadn’t given her a specific time that he’d be back, but she hoped he wasn’t there yet. Funny she thought as she opened the door, his apartment had become home to her more than her own apartment. Setting two of her crackling sacks in the kitchen and leaving the lights burning low, she hurried up the stairs to Jon’s bedroom.

She was just adjusting her wig when she heard the beep of the alarm being reset. Glancing around the room she slipped the envelope on his pillow before hurrying to the stairs. Excitement coursed through her; he was finally home.

Her bare feet were silent on the carpet and then on the wood floor. Leaning against the door frame she watched as he set something down on the counter and then turned to the refrigerator. She smiled softly as she watched him grab a magnet and hang an obviously hand-drawn masterpiece in its place of honor.

“Romeo or Jake?”

He started and then turned. He hadn’t expected her to still be awake. He roamed her from head to foot. He was glad she was. Her camisole was black tonight and it stopped just above the waist of her low slung jeans. With her hands in her pockets, the waist dragged a little lower, teasing him with a peek at more black lace. He scanned back up to her face, her eyes were clear and bright and there was just a hint of a smile tugging at her lips. He smiled and moved toward her. “Romeo. It’s supposed to be me I think.”

She moved her head to look around him. “Hard to say from here.”

Stepping in front of her he slid his hands up her sides. She had gotten so thin in the last few months. Hopefully now that the chemo was done she’d put some weight back on. But she was still just as beautiful as the day he had first seen her. “Jakey made me that.” He angled his body to point at the ceramic object on the counter. “I’m pretty sure it’s supposed to be an ashtray, but there’s no spot to hold a cigarette.”

The pride and amusement were evident in his voice. He loved his kids so very much. “So use it on the table in the foyer to catch your keys or something.”

He cupped her face in his hands, raising it slightly so he could catch her pretty mouth in a kiss. “That’s a great idea.”

She shrugged and smiled. “I have one occasionally.” Reaching up she combed her fingers through the hair at his temple. “You had a good time.”

“Yeah, but I’m ready for a little private adult party now.” He leered playfully at her as he stepped forward, moving her away from the kitchen and back toward the stairs.

“Well you just happen to be in luck.” She tugged on his hands as they mounted the stairs. “C’mon.”

He stopped her outside the bedroom door. Turning her to face him he slid her hair over her shoulder and stroked the soft, creamy skin. “Are you my present?”

Raising up on her toes she pressed her lips to his. “Partly.”

“Partly?” What did that mean?

She nodded as she opened the door. “The rest of your gift is in here.”

The room was bathed in a soft glow from the few candles she had lit and from the lamp on the bedside table. There was a plate of cheese and fruit in the sitting area along with a bottle of champagne chilling in anticipation.

Cilla led him to the settee. “I wasn’t sure if you’d even be hungry, but I thought we should at least have a toast.” She worked the cork, releasing it with a pop from the bottle. Moving to sit next to him she handed him a glass and clinked it with hers. “Happy Birthday Jonny.”

He watched her, there was something going on with her. Her eyes were a kaleidoscope of gray and blue and that smile teased her lips. “Thank you.” He sipped the golden bubbles, his eyes never leaving her face. “What is it Sweets? What’s going on with you tonight?”

She took his glass and set it on the table with hers. “I want to give you your present now. Okay?” At his nod she stood, dragging him up with her. “I’m pretty sure you’re going to like it.”

He dipped his head, finding her lips with his. He didn’t care what she had bought for him. She really didn’t have to get him anything. He had all he wanted right here. She was happy tonight and in an amorous mood. What more could he have asked for?

He slipped his hands around her waist, his fingers dipping into the waistband of her almost too loose jeans, caressing lightly before sliding down to cup her cheeks and drag her into him. With a slight push, the jeans slid down her thighs, pooling at her knees. Without taking his mouth from hers he backed her toward the bed, finally pulling his lips from her to sit her on the edge. Kneeling before her he pulled the denim from her legs and, with a gentle shove, had her lying back across the wide bed.

She got to her knees and walked to the edge of the bed. This couldn’t happen yet. He needed to see what was in that envelope first. “Jonny, wait.”

He had pulled his shirt off and his fingers stilled on his belt. “Wait for what Sweets, what’s wrong?”

She shook her head, “nothing, but you need to open your present, first.” She held out the envelope to him.

He looked quizzically at her. What was so important that it couldn’t wait another half hour or so? He looked at the envelope, only then noticing the address in the upper left corner. It was from her doctor’s office. His eyes flew to her face. The results, it had to be what was in the envelope. “When did you get this?” How long had she known something and not told him?

“I had my appointment this afternoon.”

His shoulders drooped. She had gone without him. Did that mean it was bad news? “Why didn’t you tell me it was today. I would have gone with you.”

She reached out to rest her hand on his arm. “You couldn’t have Jonny; you were with your kids today. But its okay, I managed by myself.”

There was that strong, independent woman he loved so much. He just wished that sometimes she would lean a little more on him. He looked down at the envelope again and then headed for his dresser. It didn’t matter one way or another to him what it said in there, but he wanted an answer from her about their future, no matter how long or short it may be.

“What are you doing?” He had walked away from her and was fishing around in his sock drawer for something. “Jonny, what are you looking for?”

His hand closed around the small black velvet box. “Got it.”

He came back the bed and with one hand he undid his belt and pushed his jeans to the floor, leaving him clad in the superman boxers she had given him for Valentine’s Day. Climbing on the bed, he knelt facing her. “Before I look in this envelope, I need to ask you something.” He held out the small box to her.

Looking down her eyes widened. “Wh-what is that?” He wasn’t supposed to be doing this now. He needed to know her prognosis first. She looked down at the box. Didn’t he?

He pried the box open and the pink diamond sparkled brightly even in the low light of the room. “I don’t care if we have one day, one year or a hundred years Sweets. I want you to be mine for however long our forever might be.” His gaze didn’t waiver from hers. “Marry me Sweets.”

Tears gathered in her eyes. He really didn’t care. He wanted her whether she was healthy or not. Smiling through her tears she reached out to stroke the pretty ring. “You may just get that hundred years.”

It was his turn to widen his eyes in surprise. She was okay? The chemo worked? “What did you say?” He wanted to make sure he heard her right.

Her fingers left the ring and moved to stroke his cheek. “I’m okay Jonny. The chemo did it’s job.”

Tears sprung unbidden to his eyes. He dropped the ring to the bed and wrapped her in his arms. Their forever looked a whole lot brighter now.

******

Chapter 110

Cilla stopped in front of the door and just stared for a long moment. The heavy gray metal door would take her into the dreaded room one last time.

Hopefully.

She couldn’t remember wanting anything more than she wanted this to be over and done with. She didn’t know how anyone went through this nightmare more than once. She didn’t intend on being a repeat customer.

Jon rested his hand on her shoulder, rubbing light circles at the nape of her neck. “You okay?” He knew she was ready for all this to be over. He was too. And, with any luck, the next six hours would be the end of it.

“Yeah. I guess. I just want this all to be over with.”

He squeezed her shoulder. “After today, it will be.”

She looked up over her shoulder at him. He sounded so sure about that. Did he know something she didn’t? “Your pretty mouth to God’s ear Jonny.” As the corners of that very talented mouth twitched, she pushed the door open. “Let’s get this over with.”

Sitting in her chair by the window she studied the man sitting in front of her. He was scratching furiously on the pad of paper in his lap; the pad hadn’t left his side since he had come back from California with Richie in tow. She was glad she had sent him out there. He had put up a huge fight about going, the stubborn man. But he had needed the break. He had been her rock for all these months and he never complained. At least not to her anyway. What had she done to deserve him? She asked herself that question nearly everyday and could never come up with an answer. All she knew was that she was glad he had been there through everything with her. She never would have gotten through this alone.

She drew her gaze from him to the window. The February sky was blindingly blue and the sun shone brightly. She hoped that was a good sign of things to come. She looked back over at Jon, the sunlight a halo around his now blonder head. She smiled gently. She remembered the day he had come home with that new color. To hide the grays he said. Dark hair, light hair, she didn’t care. It was just hair. Reaching up she slid her fingers under her hat and slipped it off her head. Hers was coming back finally. Would it still be dark like it was before?

Feeling her eyes on him, he looked up and smiled. She had taken off her hat and in the sunlight he could see the faint hint of peach fuzz on her head. Her hair was starting to come back. His eyes slid to her face, she looked a million miles away. What could she be thinking about? “Everything okay Sweets?”

She refocused her eyes, finding his all-knowing blue ones trained one her. “Yeah. Just thinking.” Had she ever thanked him for all he had done for her these last several months? His birthday was coming up quickly. Would she be able to give him what she wanted most?

He put his pencil and paper on the floor by his chair. “About what?”

Reaching out, she took both of his hands in hers. “You.”

He rubbed circles on the backs of her hands. “Me? What about me?”

Looking up, her gaze met his. “I don’t think I have ever told you thank you.”

“Thank you for what?” He was confused. What had he done that morning that she felt she needed to thank him for?

Letting go of one hand she slid her fingers across his jaw, cupping his cheek. He hadn’t shaved that morning and the stubble there scraped deliciously across the sensitive skin of her fingertips. “For being here with me for every one of these damn appointments. For holding my hand while I’m sicker than a dog afterwards. For putting up with all my crap moods. Just for being there for me through everything.” She looked up and gray met blue. “For loving me.” Her thumb stroked across his lower lip. “I don’t know what I did in this life to deserve you, but boy am I glad you ordered Steph’s birthday cake from me last year.”

Turning his head he kissed her fingers before moving to sit in the chair next to her. “You don’t have to thank me for anything Sweets.” Leaning in, he pressed his forehead to hers. “There isn’t anyplace else I’d be on Wednesdays and Saturdays. Any day for that matter. And for the record, I ordered that cake from Sid, not you.”

Cilla laughed and lifted her head slightly, pressing her lips to his. She started to say something and was cut off by the creak of the door opening.

“Miss Cilla!”

She turned and saw Abby standing there. She was smiling and had her hands on her hips. “You didn’t save my seat.” She turned to the man on Cilla’s left. “Mr. Jon you’re sittin’ in my chair.”

Jon snickered and kissed Cilla’s head before raising his hands in defense. “I’m sorry.”

She tapped her toe. “Are ya gonna move?”

Jennie came in with Richie following close behind. “Abby, be nice. You don’t talk to anyone like that.”

Abby dropped her head, “sorry Mr. Jon.” She raised her wide, pleading blue eyes to him. “Will you please move so I can sit next to Miss Cilla?”

Jon stood and picked the little girl up. Richie was right, she was a little firecracker. “Here” he set her in the chair he had just vacated, “I was just keeping it warm for you.”

Abby giggled. “Thanks!”

Leaving the girls to talk, he turned to Richie, “are you going to be all right here today?”

“Yeah. I think so. I brought my guitar. I thought we might get a little work done while we’re here.” Maybe if he was distracted he wouldn’t think about the last time he had been in a room like this.

Jon nodded. “I had the same thought. My notebook is over there on the floor. I had some ideas that I’ve been playing with.” Together they crossed to where Jon had left his things.

Cilla looked across at the two men; their heads were bent together going over something Jon had written. She didn’t miss Jon’s frown and the frantic erasing and crossing out he was doing. She smiled; he was ever the perfectionist, even in the beginning stages of a new song.

The feeling of a hand in hers had her turning her attention to the chair next to her. Abby was holding her hand while Nurse Mary attended to her. She smiled at the girl and then looked to her mother. “How’re you doing?”

Jennie smiled genuinely at Cilla. “So far so good today.”

It was good to see her smiling. “How’re things with Richie?”

Jennie’s smile got wider. “Good. Moving along slowly, but that’s okay. He’s a good man Cilla and he’s so good with Abby. She just adores him. I can’t tell you how surprised I was when he showed up at my place the other day. And to have him here, you can’t imagine what that means.” Jennie was a fan and she had seen what had happened to Richie when his dad had passed away. She hoped he wasn’t pushing himself too hard to be here for her and Abby.

Cilla knew it was a big step for him. “Just don’t get upset if he has to leave at some point. This can’t be easy for him.”

Jennie nodded. “I know and I told him that if that’s what he needed to do, it was okay.”

The time passed slowly as the girls talked and Jon and Richie worked. Abby dozed and Cilla watched as the three other adults shifted restlessly in their seats. It couldn’t be easy for any of them to sit still for so long. “Why don’t you all go get some lunch or take a walk or something? Abby and I will be fine on our own.” She stroked the sleeping girl’s head where it rested against her shoulder.

Jon and Richie looked almost relieved at her suggestion and Jennie looked pensive. “Are you sure you’re all right?” She really didn’t want to leave Abby alone, but she could use a little air, maybe a cup of coffee.

Cilla nodded, “yeah, go ahead. We’ll be fine.”

Richie tucked his guitar back into its case and took Jennie’s hand as they headed to the door. “We won’t be long.”

Cilla just waved them off. No reason they should have to be cooped up in this stuffy little room if they didn’t have to be. “Take your time. We’re not going anywhere.”

Bracing himself on the arms of her chair, Jon dipped down and pressed a kiss to her lips. “You sure you’re all right?”

She nodded, stroking the bulging muscles of his forearms. “Yeah.” A ghost of a smile played across her lips. “Will you do something for me?”

“What?” He would do anything for her, but just that hint of a smile had him a little leery.

Her hands slid up his arms, kneading his biceps. “I want you to relax. You’re too tense. Have a greasy cheeseburger and a heap of fries for lunch and then I want you to take Jennie and Richie to my shop. Tell Sid whatever the three of you want is on me.”

His brow furrowed. That was it? That was all she wanted? There had to be more to that smile than that.

“And?” He waited. He was sure there had to be something else.

She cocked her head to one side. “And what?”

“What else? What else do you want me to do?”

She shook her head. “Nothing. That was it.”

He dipped down for a kiss. “You sure?”

She pressed her lips to his once again. “Well,”

He grinned. “I had a feeling. What?”

She smiled. “You can bring something back from the shop for Abby. She might want something later or maybe tomorrow.”

He kissed the tip of her nose. “I don’t know about the cheeseburger and fries, but I’m sure it won’t be hard to twist Rich’s arm to get him to go to your shop. You’ve seen him around your cannolis.”

She smiled and gave him a gentle shove. “Go. Your friends are waiting.” He was stalling. “And stop worrying about me. I’m fine.”

He walked backward toward the door. She couldn’t make him stop worrying, but apparently he needed to do a better job of not letting it show. “We won’t be too long Sweets.”

She waved him off and laid her head back against the chair, her eyes sliding shut as the door clicked closed.

The room was still quiet when she opened her eyes an hour later. She’d had the most wonderful dream, but the male lead was no where to be seen.

Abby was paging through a book and looked up when Cilla moved. “Miss Cilla?”

Cilla stretched as best she could and turned. “What’s up Abby?”

“Where’s my mommy?” she asked on a near whine.

Taking a closer look, all thoughts of Jon fled. Abby didn’t look so good. “Are you all right sweetie?”

Nearly in tears, Abby shook her head. “I don’t feel good. Where’s my mommy?”

Cilla reached down for the plastic pan. “Here honey. Your mommy and Mr. Richie and Mr. Jon went to get something to eat. They should be back soon.”

Cilla’s eyes shifted furiously from the sick little girl to the door. She hoped to see one of them come through that door soon. She wasn’t feeling so great herself. Fishing in her bag for a napkin or a tissue, something to help wipe Abby up with, she didn’t hear the door open.

Jon watched her take care of Abby, ignoring the fact that she herself was nearly as green as the little girl she was trying to comfort. She had to be the strongest, most selfless woman he had ever met.

Slipping his hand in his pocket, he fingered the item he had bought weeks ago. The chemo had to work, she had to beat this. He didn’t want anything less than the rest of his life with her.

Chapter 109

The blank page stared up at him, mocking him, practically begging him to put pencil to it and come up with their next big hit.  He twirled the pencil in his hand.  He had no words right now.  He rubbed a hand over his chin.  He had nothing.  With disgust he tossed the pencil down and paced to the sliding glass door that would take him out to Richie’s patio.  Resting his arm high against the frame, he stared out at the glass-like surface of the pool and the palm trees that waved lightly in the breeze.  He shook his head, chuckling quietly.  Only Rich would have palm trees in his back yard.

Flipping the latch, the door slid open silently and he stepped into the warm California sunshine.  He paced the length of the patio before flopping down in one of the heavily cushioned chairs.  He shouldn’t be out here.  He should be back there with her.  But, and he was being honest with himself here, he was just a little bit glad that he wasn’t sitting in that room with her.

And that was the problem.

He glanced at his watch. She would be about halfway through her second to last treatment.  Hopefully Sid wouldn’t leave her alone later.  After what happened the last time he had been away, he had made it a point to talk to Sid himself and had elicited a promise from the man that he wouldn’t leave her alone, no matter what Cilla said.

Sighing, he leaned back and raised his face to the sun.  Normally he wasn’t a praying man, but today, he sent up a few silent words, hoping that somehow they would be heard and heeded.  He didn’t want her to have to go through this again.  He wanted this all to be over as much as she did so they could get on with their lives.  Looking up to the clouds he closed his eyes against the sting of tears and sighed again.  He just couldn’t lose her.  Next to his kids, she was the most right, most important thing in his life.

Richie ambled into the room, finding Jon’s guitar leaned up against a chair and the blank notebook on the table. Looking across the room he saw Jon sitting out on the patio looking for all the world like he just lost his best friend.

Grabbing up the paper and pencil, he headed outside.  “Hey.”

Jon started at his friend’s voice.  The man walked as stealthily as a cat.   “You need to put the trinkets back in your hair or add a damn bell to your neck man.”  He rubbed a hand over his chest.   “Jesus I’m too old for you to be sneaking up on me.  My heart can’t take it.”

Richie laughed and sat down.  “Sorry old man.”  They sat in a companionable silence for a while before Richie spoke again.  “Are you okay?”

“I shouldn’t have come out here Rich. I should be home.”

“Why’s that?”

Jon shifted in his chair so he was facing his friend.  “I should be with Cilla right now while she’s getting her chemo.  Not sitting here looking at your ugly mug.”

Richie nodded, now he understood his friend’s less than stellar mood.  “Did she ask you not to come out here?”

Jon shook his head.  “No, but she wouldn’t have.  She told me to ‘go write your next number one’.”  He got up and paced again, running his fingers through his hair.  “She all but shoved me out the damn door ‘here’s your hat what’s your hurry’.  She wanted me to come out here.”

Richie tapped the pad with the pencil. “You’ve been to every appointment with her, right?”  At Jon’s nod he continued.  “Sounds like she wanted you to have a break.  She’s very smart, your Cilla. You shouldn’t feel guilty for missing one.”

That was just it, he did feel guilty and he didn’t like it.  “How am I not supposed to feel guilty when I’m out here with you and she’s back there in that damn room?”

Richie nudged Jon’s chair with his foot, “sit down.”  When he was settled Richie started again.  “You can’t feel guilty for living your life Jon.  Sitting there watching her is just as bad for you as the treatment is for her.  You need a break, time to regroup so if it turns out she has to go through a second round, you can be there for her.”

Jon hung his head. Rich knew what he was talking about, he had been through this, but it still didn’t make the missing any easier.

“Cilla was right in shoving you out the door to come here.  This,” Richie indicated to the pen and paper he had set on the table, “is your job, what you get paid to do, what you need to be doing right now.” Looking at Jon he hoped he was getting through to him.  “You can spend your time here pissing and moaning about where you think you should be or we can get down to business and get this done so you can go home.  You just said she wanted you to come out here and do this.  So let’s do it so I can take your whiny ass back New York.”

Jon glared at Richie but couldn’t find fault with anything he had said.  “Fucker” he muttered, but there was no anger or malice behind it.  “Where’s my guitar?”

Richie jerked his thumb toward the house.   “Inside. You can get mine too while you’re at it.”

Jon came back with both guitars, handing one off to Richie.  “What did you mean ‘you’ can take me back to New York?  Are you flying back with me?”

Richie nodded.  “Yeah.”

Jon waited and when he didn’t add any more he prodded.  “Coming to see a particular brunette mother of one?”

A slight blush colored his cheeks.   “Yeah. I am.”

Jon idly strummed while he studied his friend.   “You like this woman a lot, don’t you?”

Richie picked up his guitar.   “She’s nice man.  We talk on the phone, e-mail. I think this could really be going somewhere.  And Abby, she’s a little firecracker.”

Jon was smiled.  He was happy for him.  He deserved a good woman; and apparently this one was making him happy. He picked up his pencil.  “I think I have something.”

Richie looked over, reading upside down what Jon was writing.  He started strumming, picking out a melody.

By the time they broke for lunch they had the bare bones of the song.  Richie set his guitar down.   “I like it. I think the guys will too.”

Jon nodded and set his guitar next to his chair.  “It will be better once we get the keys and drums, but, yeah it’s not bad.”

Richie shook his head, the man was never pleased.   “Let’s grab some lunch.”

Chapter 108

Fingering the sugar flower she had just finished she set it with the rest to dry. The cake was nearly done. The flowers should be set by the afternoon and she could place them and it would be ready to deliver tomorrow morning.

“Hey Cil” Sid called out, “do we have any more-“ he trailed off when he saw her staring aimlessly at the cake. She hadn’t seemed like herself that morning or any morning for the last few days for that matter. “Are you all right?”

Startled out of her reverie, she turned and looked at her friend. “Yeah, I guess.”

He studied her carefully. Her eyes were so sad and she looked absolutely worn out. “You look like shit Cil.”

She rolled her eyes at him. Leave it to him to say something like that. “Thanks a lot. Love you too.”

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders, “hey, if I can’t tell you the truth, who can? Now tell me what’s wrong. You haven’t been yourself lately.”

She sighed. “I haven’t been myself since the summer Sid. I’m just so ready to be done with all this treatment crap. I’ve had it.” She looked up to her friend’s face. “I dumped all over Jon the other night, totally worst Valentine’s night ever.”

His eyebrows raised in speculation. “Just what exactly did you say to him?”

She filled him in on the entire conversation from the other night. “I just lost it Sid. I totally fell apart on him. He really didn’t deserve it.” She studied the cake on table; the cake she had lovingly made for someone else’s celebration. “We didn’t even get to have our Valentine’s Day together.” She thought about the card she had for him and the silly gift she had bought. “I never even gave him his gift.”

“I’m sure he doesn’t even care about any of that.”

She shrugged. “Probably not, but I do.”

“So give it to him tonight.”

“It seems lame to do it after the fact.”

Sid rolled his eyes at his friend. “You weren’t at your best the other night sweetie and he knows that. He won’t care.” He paused for a minute, an idea forming. “Is he home right now?”

Cilla shook her head, “no, he’s in Philly at the Foundation Offices. He’ll be back tonight.”

Sid smiled, “perfect. Why don’t you pick up some sushi from Lure and have a nice little romantic evening in tonight. Give him the card and gift and just spend some quiet time together?”

Smiling for the first time that day she hugged Sid. “That’s a great idea.” She looked up at him. He was always there for her, even if it was just an ear to listen. “Thanks Sid. You’re the best.”

He hugged her tight for a minute longer. He really hoped she got a clean bill of health soon. He hated seeing her so worn out. This was not his vibrant, happy friend. He wanted her back.

Hearing her sniffle he pressed her back from him. “Hey, no crying. You know what happens when you cry. I get started and then we’re both a wreck.” In a near panic, he searched his brain for something that would get her to stop crying. “Besides, we need to talk about my cake. You can’t cry when we’re talking about my wedding cake.”

Smiling, she pulled a tissue from her pocket. “Sorry. Damn hormones. I’ve just been a mess lately.”

Sid dragged a stool over and sat next to her. “So, what are you going to do for Mark and I?”

She glanced up at the clock, “we can’t do this right now Sid, you’re still supposed to be out front.” Just then the bell over the door jangled, signaling new customers. “Go. We’ll talk about this in the morning.”

Picking up her phone she waited til Sid was through the swinging door to make her call.

~

Setting the bag on the counter, Cilla looked around the kitchen. It was where they ate just about every night. She looked through the door to the dining room and nodded. They were going to eat in there tonight. Finding some pretty place mats in the drawer of the china cabinet she set the table, Jon’s place at the head, hers to his right. She got out his good china and the crystal stemware, adding the linen napkins in the fancy rings.

In a better mood now she hummed as she laid out the sushi from Lure on a platter and set the rest of the meal in the oven to keep it warm. Setting the platter in the refrigerator she hustled up stairs to freshen up.

Studying herself in the mirror she added a little make up. Remembering how much he had appreciated her wig at Christmas, she decided to wear it tonight as well. She really wasn’t in the mood for anything more than just curling up with him, but he liked the way it looked on her and tonight was for him. Donning her red silk night shirt and matching robe she headed back down the stairs and met him in the hallway as he was hanging up his coat.

“Hi there.”

He turned, his eyes roamed over her taking in the wig, the little bit of make up that tried to cover the dark circles that never seemed to leave her face and the pretty pajamas. Usually she wore one of his t-shirts and cotton pajama pants. He couldn’t stop the smile and the increase in his pulse. This was a nice surprise. “Hi yourself.”

She stepped off the last step with a smile and slid into his arms. “How was your day dear?”

He smirked and dropped a kiss to her lips. “It was hectic. But at least I don’t have to go back tomorrow.” He did, however, have to go to LA but he wouldn’t remind her of that right now. He didn’t want to spoil her good mood.

Arm in arm they walked to the kitchen, he was surprised not to see the table set. “Are we going out?” Did he forget to make a reservation somewhere? He looked at her again. No, they couldn’t be going anywhere, she was in her pajamas.

Moving around him she pulled the platter of sushi from the fridge. “I thought we’d eat in tonight. I hope you don’t mind.”

He shook his head as he followed her into the dining room. His eyebrows rose at the pretty table she had set, the bottle of wine chilling in the bucket, the candles and flowers he had given her in the middle of it all. “Are we celebrating something?”

Pouring him a glass of wine she handed him the box that was next to her chair. “Yes. I know Valentine’s Day is really just a Hallmark holiday, but I got you something anyway. And, as I was a total basket case the other night I thought we’d just have a quiet night in and you could have your gift.”

He set the box on the table. He could really have cared less about Valentines Day. He didn’t need a special day on the calendar to tell him when to make a romantic gesture for his girl. “You’re right, it is a Hallmark holiday and you didn’t have to get me anything. I’m just glad to see you in better spirits today Sweets.”

She took a sip of her wine. “I know, but I wanted to. It’s just something silly anyway, but it made me think of you.”

He picked up the box again; it was so light he gave it a little shake to make sure there was actually something in it. “Are you sure there’s something in here?”

“Oh yeah. There’s something in there all right.”

With a dubious look he ripped the pretty blue paper, dropping it to the floor and set the box on his plate and lifted the lid. He could see just a peek of something blue beneath the tissue paper. Fishing through he lifted the blue from the box. It was a pair of silk boxer shorts with the superman symbol scattered all over them. He chuckled. “These made you think of me? But I don’t wear…” he trailed off when she smiled at him.

“I know, but I thought maybe you would. For me.”

If it would keep her smiling like that, he’d go out and buy a year’s worth and wear them every day. “Should I go put them on right now?”

Chapter 107

“God” she groaned and flushed the toilet. Again. She hated this; hated it more than she hated her ex-husband and she despised him. If she never threw up again it would be far too soon. With another groan she leaned forward and heaved into the bowl. She didn’t want to do this anymore. She only had two more weeks to go, but enough was enough already. Leaning back she found his warm hard body and collapsed against him.

“This sucks.”

He stroked her arm. “I know.” Just watching her go through this every week damn near killed him.

He knew? What the hell did he know? He wasn’t the one getting pumped full of poison twice a week and then spending the better part of the evening slumped over the toilet like a drunk who couldn’t hold his drink.

“Wanna trade places? Next time you can get jabbed with a needle, sit around for hours having poison dripped into you and then spend your evening trying to turn yourself inside out.” She had barely got the words out when she leaned over again.

He shook his head. It wouldn’t be his first choice of how he’d like to spend his day, but if he could take her place he certainly would. He hated not being able to do anything but watch her go through this. Holding her now and sitting with her while she took the treatment was all he could do but it never seemed like enough. “You know I would if I could.”

Leaning back again she rubbed her arm. It was throbbing like a bitch. Nurse Mary hadn’t been there today and Nurse Ratchet had been less than skilled at administering her IV. Thank goodness Abby had the port. At least she didn’t have to endure the poke and jab when the nurse couldn’t get a vein on the first try.

Flushing one last time Cilla dragged herself to her feet, stumbled to the vanity and reached for her toothbrush. Glancing at herself in the mirror as she brushed, she hung her head and nearly cried. It had been a bad day all around and having to have chemo was the rotten cherry on top. She would have given her left arm, bruise, pinprick and all, to be back on St. Bart’s instead of here. Anywhere would have been better than here right now.

Everyone and their brother it seemed had been in the shop that morning. The heart-shaped cookies and pink and white decorated cupcakes and brownies had flown out the door as fast as she could fill the cases. Valentine’s Day was nearly as busy for her as the holidays. Today it seemed everyone wanted to surprise their loved ones with sweets and treats. And she had a cake to finish for a wedding on Saturday. Heart-shaped red velvet no less.

She spit into the sink and caught Jon standing in the doorway watching her. God, couldn’t he leave her alone for two minutes to brush her damn teeth? “Happy fucking Valentine’s Day” she mumbled as she shoved the toothbrush back into her mouth. She closed her eyes. Jesus, she was a miserable bitch today.

“What was that?”

Wiping her mouth she tried to push by him to get to the bedroom but he held fast. “What did you say?” He hadn’t quite understood what she said around her toothbrush.

She looked up at him, angry tears threatening in the storm clouds of her eyes. “I said, Happy fucking Valentine’s Day.” She shoved her way past him and sat on the bed.

He watched her walk away, shoulders slumped, head at an angry tilt. “What is wrong with you today?”

She looked up at him, tears tracking down her cheeks. “What’s wrong with me? Have you looked at me lately?!”

He moved to sit next to her but she held up a hand, stopping him. She wasn’t in the mood to be coddled. “Look at me. This damn fucking disease-” she stopped, taking a breath to try to calm herself down. “This is killing me. I can’t do this anymore. I’m a mess Jon.”

“No, you’re not.” Where was this coming from?

She nodded, “yes I am. Look at me! I’ve got a bruise the size of New Jersey on the inside of my arm; I have no hair, no eyebrows, not even my eyelashes survived. I’ve lost so much weight I’ve had to go shopping twice since Thanksgiving. I’m miserable all the damn time. I’m exhausted more than that and I’m sick of this routine we’ve fallen into! And,” she paused, trying to get a handle on her emotions. When she spoke again, her voice was quieter, thick with unshed tears. “I hate that you have to watch this happen to me. I’m just sick and tired of all of it.” She dropped her head to her hands, crying in earnest.

He sat down next to her, she didn’t push him away. He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close, pressing kisses to her head. While he knew all of this was wearing on her, he hadn’t realized she had so much anger and resentment bottled up inside her. She was never one to complain, even when she had an absolute right to. She was always the one taking care of everyone else. How much did she expect to do before it all overwhelmed her? He knew she was bound to crack at some point.

He had seen the weariness when they had been in St. Bart’s. She had slept late every morning, napped most afternoons as well. They hadn’t done much but she hadn’t wanted to anyway. She spent most of her days just sitting on a lounger on the deck of their villa, watching the ocean crash into the beach. He did manage to cajole her into walking on the beach and dinner out on New Year’s Eve, but other than that, she pretty much stayed in.

Then he had insisted she come to Washington, D.C. for the inauguration with him. He should have known she’d be too worn out, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer. He had walked her all over D.C. for the weekend festivities and the inauguration itself, then he had kept her up til all hours at the ball he had performed at. It’s no wonder she was falling apart now. Christ, what had he been thinking?

Angry at himself for adding to her misery he stroked her back and, as much as her tears were tearing him apart, he let her have her cry. “Shhh, it’s okay Sweets.”

Sniffling against him she straightened, “no Jonny, it’s not. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have dumped all my frustrations out on you. You didn’t do anything to deserve it.”

Reaching around her, he grabbed the tissues off the night table and handed her one. “It’s okay. You needed to vent and, as I caused some of this, you have every right to take it out on me.”

She wiped her eyes and blew her nose. “What are you talking about? You didn’t cause any of this.”

He nodded, “sure I did. I all but kidnapped you to Washington when clearly you should have stayed home and tried to take it easy after our trip to St. Bart’s.” He wasn’t going to apologize for taking her to the warmth and sunshine. They had both needed that.

“If I really hadn’t wanted to go to DC I wouldn’t have. But you’re right. I should have stayed home.” She sighed and grabbed another tissue. “I’m just miserable tonight Jonny. I’m sorry. I just wish the doctor would tell me something.”

“Two more weeks and then you’ll know.”

She heaved out a trembling sigh. “I know. It’s going to be the longest two weeks of my life.”

He chuckled. “Come on let’s get you into this bed. You need some rest.”

Together they got her out of her clothes and under the covers. He kissed her forehead. “I’m going to make you some soup and toast.”

She nodded and laid her hand on his cheek. “Thanks.”

He kissed her fingertips. “Anything for you.”

When he came back she was asleep. He set the tray on the night table. The soup could be reheated later. He crawled onto the bed and curled up with her. The card and flowers would just have to wait until she was awake.

Chapter 106

His hand slid slowly up her thigh, gathering a fistful of cashmere as he went, bunching it at her hip. He found a silky thigh and a lace stocking top under the soft wool. “Merry Christmas to me” he murmured as he pushed the dress slightly higher before dropping it and drawing her from the door to the living room.


Letting her go he picked up a remote from the end table and with the flick of a couple of buttons, the tree was lit and the soft wail of a jazzy holiday saxophone floated through the room. Turning back to her he stopped and just stared. Her dress was in a puddle on the floor at her feet; she was a vision in black silk and lace.


Crossing to her, his jacket joined her dress on the floor. He ran his fingertips slowly up her arms, drawing small circles on her shoulders. The light from the tree was throwing rainbows and light across her silky skin. His lips brushed hers, just a whisper of a kiss. “I wanted to do the unwrapping myself.”


Nimble fingers worked the buttons of his shirt. “I saved the best parts for you.”


He let her slide the shirt from his shoulders. As it fluttered to the floor in the ever growing pile he slid his arms around her waist. His lips grazed hers and he turned them in a slow circle. He was in no hurry tonight. There had been enough rushing around in the last few weeks.


She had been going nonstop between her treatments and the holiday rush for sweets and treats. He hadn’t been much better what with going back and forth to Philadelphia, meetings with Habitat and Project H.O.M.E. and the urge to write had been so strong lately that he’d been talking with Richie nearly every day. There hadn’t been much time for “them”. But not tonight. Tonight was all about them.


Stepping back he turned and eased her down onto the wide sofa, pushing the throw pillows to the floor. Calloused fingertips caressed the soft skin that threatened to spill over the cups of her bra. Soft, eager lips followed, tasting in the wake of his fingers.


She trembled under him. Her skin seemed to sing with each lingering touch. She wanted him like she had their first time. Her hands slid up smooth strong shoulders. Shoulders that bore the weight of the world some days; shoulders that held her up more than anyone ever had before. Tangling her fingers into his hair she tugged his head up. Her lips brushed against his, nipping at his bottom lip. Their mouths came together. There was comfort in the kiss and, as the kiss spun out, there was fire. He always managed to give her both.


Her whimper when he pulled his mouth away turned to a purr when he found the stiff kernel of her nipple through the midnight silk. Feeling a hand slip under her she raised her shoulders and he flicked her bra open with one hand. The silk and lace landed somewhere behind him and he cupped the soft mound, brushing his thumb back and forth across the hardened tip.


Shifting under him, she raised her knee along his hip, cradling him between her thighs. He was so hard against her. She pressed up against him, silently searching for the release that was just out of reach. Her hands slid over his amazing ass and around to his belt. Easing his pants open she reached inside, taking him in her hand. Hot and hard, soft and silky. All for her.


She stroked him with purpose, intent on making him as crazy as he was making her. When she let him go to push at his pants he stopped her.


“Not yet baby.”


“But…”


His mouth captured hers before she could finish her thought. His hand slid under her again, cupping her butt before slipping inside and pushing at her panties. Sitting back on his feet he slid the scrap of lace off and stroked her stocking encased leg. His lips cruised along the inside of her leg, nipping lightly at the inside of her knee. He could feel her trembling as his tongue traveled higher. He wanted her to be ready, had to be sure she was ready.


He moved slowly, stroking his fingers up the sensitive skin of her inner thighs. Her hips bucked at the first intimate touch. “Shh” he whispered against her. His tongue slid higher, worrying the little knot that was standing proud, just waiting for him. Dipping his fingers into her he was pleasantly surprised to find that she was more than ready for him.


She arched off the couch as the wave rolled through her. Her earlier preparations had been unnecessary. She could feel for herself just how ready she was for him. “Jonny, please” she begged on a near sob. She didn’t want to wait any longer. She had to have him inside her. Now.


Standing, he added his pants to the pile on the floor and moved back over her. His groan of relief matched hers as he flexed his hips and slowly buried himself inside her. This was all he had wanted for Christmas. There was nothing on her face but pleasure, nothing in her eyes but the ecstasy of having him as close to her as he could possibly be. He moved slowly, savoring every sigh and purr he drew from her. Dipping his head his lips found hers. He kissed her as slowly as he moved his hips. He wanted to draw out every bit of pleasure for her that he could.


When he felt her tighten around him again, he pulled her knee higher on his hip and held her closer, letting her drain him of everything he had.


Slipping to his side, he stayed tangled with her. He pulled the blanket from the back of the couch over them as he cradled her against him. “I love you” he whispered as they drifted.

Chapter 105

The din from the crowd nearly drowned out the holiday music that was filtering through the restaurant as they stepped inside the door. No sooner had the hostess seen Jon than their coats were whisked away and the maître’d led them to their table.


The normally muted tones of brown and gray were decked out for the holidays with festive wreaths and tiny white lights. The mantle of the fireplace at the far end of the room was dressed in its holiday best with fragrant evergreen boughs and red bows. Even the tables hadn’t escaped the decorator’s hand with their red napkins and green candles.


Jon had called in every favor he could to get this reservation. Per Se was the hottest restaurant in the City right now and nearly impossible to get into. He had damn near sold his soul to be able to bring her here tonight. And it wouldn’t have been the first time he had done that to get what he wanted.


His eyes followed the gentle sway of Cilla’s hips as they walked across the dining room. It had been worth every ounce of aggravation. She took his breath away, and it wasn’t the wig. He pulled out her chair for her. Well, not just the wig.


It was rare he saw her in anything other than her work clothes or jeans these days. They didn’t get out much because she wasn’t usually feeling up to it and when they did go out, it was never anyplace that required anything dressier than jeans and a sweater. Not that it mattered. He was a jeans guy himself but tonight he had hoped she would wear something pretty for him. He got more than he bargained for with that wish.


Sitting across from him she was silhouetted in candlelight against the large expanse of windows. She fairly glowed tonight. He reached across the table, taking her hand in his. “You look beautiful tonight.”


“Thank you.”


She flipped her hair over her shoulder and his gaze was drawn from the small silver hoop in her ear to the pink sparkle at her throat. She had worn that necklace every day since he had given it to her. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small box. He had intended on saving this for later, but he wanted her to have it now instead.


As he was about to slide it toward her, the Sommelier appeared. Before he could start his spiel about the wines Jon ordered a bottle of Sancerre. “Excellent choice sir.” He disappeared to fetch the bottle and two glasses.


Jon slid the small, black velvet box toward Cilla. “Merry Christmas Sweets.”


She looked down at the box. “I thought we weren’t doing this until later.” There were gifts under the tree at his apartment, left there for each other when one thought the other wasn’t looking.


“I didn’t want to wait.”


She fingered the box before reaching toward her purse. “Then I guess you can have this now too.” She handed him the box she had brought with her. “Merry Christmas.”


She didn’t wait to see if he was watching her or if he was opening his own gift. She picked up the box. The hinges were silent as she opened the small box. Her gasp wasn’t as quiet. “Oh Jonny, they’re beautiful.” Small pink and white stone encrusted hoop earrings glistened up at her in the dim light of the restaurant.


He smiled. “I’ve noticed you don’t wear much jewelry but I thought these were small enough not to get in your way. And they match the necklace you never take off.”


She fingered the stone at her throat. Of course she never took it off, it was from him. “How bad would Miss Manners yell at me if I put them on right now?”


He chuckled, “go for it. I’m gonna open mine while you do that.”


She nodded and took out the earrings she had been wearing forever. “I hope you like it.”


Sliding the box from the wrapping he grinned. “It’s from one of my favorite stores, how could I not like it?”


She shrugged and put her old earrings into the box and tucked her hair behind her ears. “What do you think?”


He didn’t answer, he was too distracted by the item in the box he had just opened. The square silver charm dangled at the based of the black leather cord. It had a cut out of a crown in the middle. “A crown?” She was the queen of tarts, why would she be giving him a crown?


She gave him a knowing smile. “You are my prince charming, right?”


He nodded and smiled back, remembering the conversation they had had the night after she had first met Abby. “I guess I am.” He pulled the necklace from the box and fastened it around his neck. The charm nestled in the hollow at the base of his throat. Hoping no one would notice, he leaned across the table and kissed her gently. “Thank you.”


A discreet cough had Jon leaning back in his chair and Cilla flushing lightly. The waiter was standing there, waiting. “Are you ready to order?”


Cilla watched while Jon perused the menu one last time. While she waited she slipped off one of her shoes and slid her toes along his shoe and up, under the cuff of his pants.


His body tightened when he felt her stocking-clad toes traveled up inside his pant leg, rubbing where his sock had slid down. His fingers laced with hers across the table, his grip tightening with each stroke of her foot against his calf. Keeping his voice as steady as possible he gave the waiter his order. As the young man walked away he leaned in close to Cilla. “What are you trying to do to me?”


“I don’t know what you’re talking about” she replied not so innocently and moved her foot again.


He closed his eyes briefly before taking a sip of his wine. “You’re trouble, you know that” he said quietly.


She propped her chin on her hand, “yet you’re making no effort to stop me.” Her foot kept up the slight rubbing against his leg.


The truth of it was he didn’t want her to stop. She was enjoying herself and he didn’t want to put a damper on her fun. It had been too long since she had been in such a mood. But if she wasn’t careful, he wouldn’t be able to walk out of the restaurant without embarrassing himself. “Just take it easy Sweets. I need to be able to walk out of here later.”


She let up a little bit while they ate, but only a little. She was still so wound up from their interlude at her apartment that she couldn’t help herself. She really wanted to just shovel the food into her mouth and drag him back to his place and have her way with him. But she couldn’t do that. She patiently waited and ate her meal at a reasonable pace, sipped her wine and chatted with him; all the while doing her best not to look at her watch every thirty seconds.


Slipping her shoe back on, she stood and grabbed her purse. “I’ll be right back.”


He stood, pulling his jacket closed in front of him. “Where are you going?”


“Ladies room.”


He nodded and sat back down to wait. He was as ready to go as she was. If the waiter would bring the bill they could get the fuck out of there and get home. Then it would really be Christmas.


Coming out of the bathroom she found Jon standing there with her coat. “Ready?”


He nodded and held her coat. “Let’s go home.”


No sooner did they clear the door then he had her up against it, unbuttoning her coat, divesting her of her scarf. “You make me crazy. You know that, right?”


She could barely see in the dim light in the hallway, but she could feel every touch, every breath in her ear as he spoke, every pass of his lips across hers.


“You had your fun in the restaurant Sweets. Now, it’s my turn.”

Chapter 104

“Whew.” Cilla locked the door and leaned against it. “What a day!” It was the day before Christmas Eve and the shop had been non-stop all day.

Sid was leaning on one of the glass cases. “You said it girl. We’re only here til noon tomorrow, right?” He and Mark were spending the holidays with Mark’s family and it was a four hour drive upstate. He wanted to be sure they weren’t working any later than necessary.

Cilla moved behind the counter with him. “Absolutely. I have six orders that will be picked up by 11:30 and then you’re free until the new year.” They had exchanged gifts earlier that week and tonight she and Jon would have their Christmas. Tomorrow night they would have his kids and then on Christmas Day after dropping the kids back to Dorothea, they were leaving for St. Bart’s with a short stop in Florida to visit his parents. They wouldn’t be back until January 2. And hopefully by then, the expansion on her shop would be finished. They were ready to break through and connect the two spaces so her being away worked out well.

Working as quickly as they could, they cleaned up, stacked pans and shut out the lights. She gave Sid a quick kiss and he went around front to pull down the gate as she ran up the stairs to her apartment. Jon was taking her out to dinner and she needed to make herself beautiful. She stopped at the kitchen table and looked at the package Raffele had dropped off. She hadn’t said anything to Sid about this. She wanted Jon to be the first one to see her with it on.

Standing in front of the mirror still wrapped in a towel she slid the wig onto her head. It was so comfortable and light, she could almost forget it was a wig. The color and wave were perfect and it hung nearly to the middle of her back. Not as long as her own hair had been, but that was all right. At least she had hair again.

Picking up her compact, she made up her face. With her eyebrows penciled on and color in her cheeks, she was starting to feel like her old self. Dropping the towel, she stepped into her panties and took her time with her stockings. It had been a long time since she had gotten all dressed up. She didn’t want to run her stockings or ruin the dress.

The dress. She had finally broken down and gone shopping. Nothing in her closet was fitting anywhere near the way it should lately. The weight loss was just another fabulous side effect of all she was wanted to forget about for just this one night.

The midnight blue cashmere was soft as water and the wide v-neck barely clung to her shoulders as she dropped it over her head. The slight hint of lace peeking from her edges of her bra would drive Jon nuts. Stepping into the black patent mile high pumps she took one last look in the mirror and smiled. She looked pretty damn good if she did say so herself. And she hadn’t even needed Sid’s help tonight.

She had just tucked her lipstick into her clutch and grabbed the small box from Versani’s she had picked up earlier when the knock sounded and the door opened. “Sweets, you ready?” Jon scanned the rarely used apartment, smiling at the subtle touches of Christmas that dotted the small living area.

She stepped from her room and he didn’t know where to look first. The dress clung to every inch of her, her legs looked a mile long, and her hair was… wait, her hair? His eyes flew to her face, “when did you…” he looked back to the hair that surrounded her and then to her face again, “where did you… you have hair?” For a man who made his living with his words, he was at a total loss for the right ones now.

Smiling she stepped closer to him. “It was just delivered today. You’re the first to see it. Do you like it?”

He motioned for her to turn so he could see it from the back. “It looks great.” His fingers stretched out to touch it. Would it be as soft as her own hair had been or would it be stiff and unforgiving? He was hoping for the former and he wasn’t disappointed. When she was facing him again he let the strands slide through his fingers, “you look amazing.”

She grasped his fingers in her own and lifted her eyes to his. “Thank you.” She pressed her lips to his. The look on his face and the heat in his eyes were worth every penny she had spent. His overcoat was open and she slid her hands up the lapels of the black sport coat he wore, her thumbs stroking the freshly shaved skin of his jaw before twining her fingers in the hair that curled around his collar.

With a low groan Jon pulled her closer, taking the kiss deeper. One hand slid up her back to the nape of her neck, the other slid down, cupping one cheek. As the kiss spun out, the heat between them grew and his hand that had been resting lightly on her bottom fisted in the soft wool of her dress, slowly dragging it up to her hip. All the control he had shown in the days since Thanksgiving was nearly thrown out the window and he had all he could do not to rip the dress off her and bury himself inside her right here where they stood. Without thinking, he took a step, then another and as they bumped the table his phone buzzed in his pocket. Fuck. He pulled his mouth from hers and blew out a breath.

Cilla opened her eyes and found his boring into her. She was leaning back on the table; one arm still draped around his shoulders the other keeping her from falling back. Her hips cradled his, her chest heaved as she tried to catch her breath. “So, the hair works for you then.”

He dropped his head to her chest, pressed a kiss to the smooth expanse of skin and chuckled. "The whole package works for me Sweets." Straightening, he helped her from the table, his dick leapt forward, not wanting the separation anymore than the rest of him did. He tamped down the lust and helped her on with her coat, "the car is waiting."

She took a deep breath and followed him out of the apartment. They were so going to finish what they had just started. She watched him as he trotted down the stairs. She was ready for him tonight. All her primping and preening had included making sure they wouldn't have to worry about anything later.

He stopped and turned back, "you coming?"

She smiled and made her way down the stairs.  Not yet she thought to herself, but they both would be later.